Tugas Suami Kepada Isteri
MARRIED LIFE #1. THE DUTIES OF THE HUSBAND
By HanaChelly
21 mars 2015The family is the building block of society!…and the « husband-wife » relationship is the building block of the family.This is why we are sharing with you, in this first chapter, a list of duties that a husband has towards his spouse.
DUTY Nº1: To fulfill her needs.The husband must, according to his capacity, fulfill the primary needs of his spouse (to feed her, dress her, provide a shelter for her, etc.) He must as far as possible use his own financial means for this.« Work more, to give more…to the wife! »
DUTY N°2: To protect her.The husband must protect his wife from any dangers!Whether they may be from his own violence (physical or psychological), or from external dangers. A woman must feel secure in the presence of her husband… not when he is absent.
DUTY N°3: To be patient with her. The husband must patiently accept the shortcomings of his spouse. If he sees something in her that he dislikes, he must let her know TACTFULLY.If one of her short-comings is persistent, he must keep in mind the numerous qualities which he does appreciate in her. In any case, a husband cannot hate his wife, as she is first and foremost a believer.
DUTY n°4 : To teach her.The husband must teach his wife the basics of religious observance. If he cannot do so himself, he must make sure that she has the means she needs to learn. He must never look at his wife as a « rival », but rather as an ally with whom to make progress together!This is all the more important given that this learning is essential for the future education of their children.
DUTY N°5 : To instruct her to do good.The husband must instruct his wife to be regular in her religious practice. He must also encourage her to carry out good deeds and to keep her behaviour honourable.
DUTY N°6 : To be authoritative.The husband must protect his spouse from what is wrongful (such as gossip, laziness, etc). He must know how to be firm when faced with behaviour that could undermine their life as a couple.
DUTY N°7 : To be available for her.A man must make himself available to accompany his wife when she wants to go out. He must, for example, allow her to visit her parents, to visit her neighbours or to pray at the mosque.Being available also means to devote one’s attention to one’s wife…
DUTY N°8 : To behave himself well towards her.The husband must talk in the best of ways with his wife. His words must be as gentle as honey, and his behaviour must be chivalrous. There is nothing more reprehensible than the man who acts like a cat in front of his friends and like a lion in front of his family.He must also help his wife shoulder her domestic responsibilities, if need be by grabbing the mop and bucket himself!
DUTY N°9 : To preserve her honour.The husband must ABSOLUTELY avoid talking about private matters (concerning his wife) with his friends or family. He must establish trust between himself and his wife if he wishes her to remain sincere towards him, and if he wishes to preserve her honour.
DUTY N°10 : To consult her view.The husband must not be afraid or ashamed to regularly consult his wife in both day-to-day matters and important matters. Not only can she be of great help and provide precious advice, but in consulting with her, you can show her how much you value her, and make her feel that she is very important to you.…….Of course, this list is not complete! You can still read many books on the subject of marital life in Islam. Do not forget that for a Muslim, it is a duty to learn about one’s duties! (Because the duties of some are the rights of others.)
In the next episode, we will talk about the duties of the wife towards her husband, Insha’ Allah!In the meantime, do not hesitate to share with us your advice for a better life in marriage.
By HanaChelly
21 mars 2015The family is the building block of society!…and the « husband-wife » relationship is the building block of the family.This is why we are sharing with you, in this first chapter, a list of duties that a husband has towards his spouse.
DUTY Nº1: To fulfill her needs.The husband must, according to his capacity, fulfill the primary needs of his spouse (to feed her, dress her, provide a shelter for her, etc.) He must as far as possible use his own financial means for this.« Work more, to give more…to the wife! »
DUTY N°2: To protect her.The husband must protect his wife from any dangers!Whether they may be from his own violence (physical or psychological), or from external dangers. A woman must feel secure in the presence of her husband… not when he is absent.
DUTY N°3: To be patient with her. The husband must patiently accept the shortcomings of his spouse. If he sees something in her that he dislikes, he must let her know TACTFULLY.If one of her short-comings is persistent, he must keep in mind the numerous qualities which he does appreciate in her. In any case, a husband cannot hate his wife, as she is first and foremost a believer.
DUTY n°4 : To teach her.The husband must teach his wife the basics of religious observance. If he cannot do so himself, he must make sure that she has the means she needs to learn. He must never look at his wife as a « rival », but rather as an ally with whom to make progress together!This is all the more important given that this learning is essential for the future education of their children.
DUTY N°5 : To instruct her to do good.The husband must instruct his wife to be regular in her religious practice. He must also encourage her to carry out good deeds and to keep her behaviour honourable.
DUTY N°6 : To be authoritative.The husband must protect his spouse from what is wrongful (such as gossip, laziness, etc). He must know how to be firm when faced with behaviour that could undermine their life as a couple.
DUTY N°7 : To be available for her.A man must make himself available to accompany his wife when she wants to go out. He must, for example, allow her to visit her parents, to visit her neighbours or to pray at the mosque.Being available also means to devote one’s attention to one’s wife…
DUTY N°8 : To behave himself well towards her.The husband must talk in the best of ways with his wife. His words must be as gentle as honey, and his behaviour must be chivalrous. There is nothing more reprehensible than the man who acts like a cat in front of his friends and like a lion in front of his family.He must also help his wife shoulder her domestic responsibilities, if need be by grabbing the mop and bucket himself!
DUTY N°9 : To preserve her honour.The husband must ABSOLUTELY avoid talking about private matters (concerning his wife) with his friends or family. He must establish trust between himself and his wife if he wishes her to remain sincere towards him, and if he wishes to preserve her honour.
DUTY N°10 : To consult her view.The husband must not be afraid or ashamed to regularly consult his wife in both day-to-day matters and important matters. Not only can she be of great help and provide precious advice, but in consulting with her, you can show her how much you value her, and make her feel that she is very important to you.…….Of course, this list is not complete! You can still read many books on the subject of marital life in Islam. Do not forget that for a Muslim, it is a duty to learn about one’s duties! (Because the duties of some are the rights of others.)
In the next episode, we will talk about the duties of the wife towards her husband, Insha’ Allah!In the meantime, do not hesitate to share with us your advice for a better life in marriage.
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